Vale Weekly Spray Tan: 2011-2018

Well, the time has come my good friend.

A bond that has spanned over six and a half glorious years, has come to a close.

When I found out our regular meetings would need to stop, that the salon was closing and we’d have to go our separate ways, I was standing naked in front of a woman holding a spray gun. I was already in one of the most vulnerable positions possible, and as she flippantly broke the news to me, it took everything in my power to not let my face fall with heartache.

Week in, week out, for six and a half years I have been meeting with you. Apart from my annual holidays, I never missed an appointment.

You were the light during some incredibly dark times.

When I felt down on myself, it was you that pepped me back up again. Whenever I was feeling ugly or had people comment on how “sick” I looked, I’d book an appointment with you, and all would be resolved in minutes. Some days, you made me go from a 3/10 to a solid 8/10. You gave me the confidence to attend parties and dinners without a care; you are the reason I felt okay wearing anything that ends above the knee.

There have been countless times you have saved me from having a legitimate bitchfit about the way I looked. You made me appear defined and fit on days I felt soft and sluggish. You made my white Nikes pop and my somewhat spotty and dry skin glow. As I reflect on all these wonderful things, I realise just how much I have taken you for granted.

It wasn’t always smooth sailing.

There was a change in management, lack of communication and newbie tanners who didn’t understand your relationship with my skin. Sometimes you were particularly dark; you made my boyfriends gone by wrinkle their nose in disgust at your distinct smell; sometimes I looked like an actual Chico baby. Sometimes you were uneven which would cause me great distress. But as I grew older and got to know you better, I learnt to not obsess over the little things.

No matter what differences we had, or what roadblocks we encountered, we always stuck by each other and got through it together.

You will be sorely missed. From the bottom of my heart, thank you for all of the good times.

Vale weekly spray tan. Vale.